surrounded by heaven but living in hell


The most beautiful place on earth

Close your eyes for a moment. Now visualize a white sandy beach and the bluest water and sky you could imagine…. a cloudless sky, the sun high in the sky and warming the ground, a gorgeous breeze blowing by your hair or your clothes, the most beautiful beach you could imagine being on…. look off of the shore, do you see the military ship? Behind you and all around you… the fences, walls, the open air prison.

I’m not even going to pretend to understand the feeling that those living in Gaza have to deal with every single day. I’ve been really stressed out lately because every time I hear a loud noise I flinch, thinking that it’s a gun shot… I saw a shooting star a few nights ago and literally ducked… the first thought in my head was, “Oh god, I wonder what it hit… I hope they were able to get out okay.” I mistook a shooting star (seriously one of my favorite things in the world) for a missile. I shake, my chest gets tight, it becomes hard to breathe… typical signs of anxiety, but from what?

From watching footage of Israel’s Operation Cast Lead. I’m traumatized from watching video, in my home, in my comfortable bed on my computer. Ya Allah… If I am this affected… what about the kids? I’m an adult, in the USA, whose biggest worry is whether I’m going to start my day with a single or a double shot of espresso. What about the little girls and boys whose bodies are maimed? Who have lost their parents, siblings, communities?

What about them? What do we do for them? How can we help them? I sit every day and think and come up with solutions and I always end up being disappointed.  I’m only one person, what am I capable of? I don’t know… but I do have an idea of what I would like to do and the next days and weeks will be filled with research to figure out if it is even possible.

Until then…. I can hear the birds already waking up… I need to sleep!

Besitos amores.

Alhamdulilah wa salat wa salam a3la nabiyna Muhammed wa a3la ahli wa sa7bihi saleeman katheera.


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