I haven’t blogged in over a month, and for that… I’m sorry.
Have you ever had a case of writer’s block…
That you can’t kick no matter how hard you try?
That’s me right now. It’s driving me insane. I have literally sat down at my computer every night since my last post telling myself, tonight I’ll write… and the minutes tick away to hours… and suddenly I find myself watching Boardwalk Empire and disappearing into the dvr time warp.
I need to write, and to release all of this toxicity that I’ve been holding inside with the things that have come up for me to deal with lately, but the words are all a jumble in my head.
What I need is some mint lemonade, a bright and shiny sun, to be sitting out and feeling the breeze in Palestine. I need a taste of home, I’m starting to miss it too much and it’s taking over my thoughts.
I can’t even begin to imagine how my father feels, not having been able to come home for 30 years because he was working to support us. Seriously, he and my mom are the most incredible human beings that I have ever met.
My brain is on the verge of meltdown after getting about 90 min of sleep last night and working through today but I do have my notebook out and I’m jotting stuff down that I need to get out of me…. being publicly attacked for one… and seeing that it was me… on my own, with no one to come to my aid. I’m realizing that even though I joke about being descendent of lions and honey badgers, and super fierce… I may actually come off as not needing someone to have my back…. either that, or people are just that dang racist in the area where I live.
So this is what I’m going to do:
I promise a post every single day.
Even if it’s just a picture.
Because I can’t let my mind get this full again.
Alhamdulilah wa salat wa salam 3ala khatim il anbiya rasool allah wa a3la ahlihi wa sa7bihi salman katheera.